How to Be Single During Holidays – A Guide by Vital Partners
The holiday season is often painted as a time of warmth, togetherness, and joy. However, if you’re single, it can sometimes feel more like a spotlight highlighting your relationship status. It’s the time of year when there are more parties, functions and just catch ups with friends and family, that we may be invited to. Whether you’ve been single for a while or have recently come out of a relationship, this time of year can be emotionally tricky.
At Vital Partners, we understand that being single during the holidays doesn’t mean you’re incomplete, but it can come with challenges, especially when you’re surrounded by coupled-up family members, and well-meaning (but nosy) questions from relatives. That’s why we’ve created this comprehensive guide to help you not only survive but thrive as a single person this holiday season.
- The Dreaded Question: “Why Are You Still Single?”
Let’s face it, almost everyone who’s been single over the holidays has faced that question. Whether it’s coming from a well-meaning aunt, a cheeky cousin, or your overly-involved parents, it can make you feel defensive or frustrated.
Instead of reacting emotionally, prepare a few calm, light-hearted, or even humorous responses. These answers help shift the conversation away from your love life while giving others a little insight into your current priorities.
Here are some examples:
- “I’ve been looking but just haven’t found the right person. Online dating hasn’t made it any easier!”
- “I’ve been focused on my career/studies this year. Honestly, I haven’t had the headspace for anything else.”
- “I’m saving up for some extended travel next year. It’s not the best time to start something serious. Have you ever been to Italy?”
- “I’m thinking of taking a role overseas. A change of scenery might bring new people into my life.”
- “Honestly, I’m enjoying being single right now. What are your plans for the new year?”
Pro Tip: Redirect the conversation. Ask them about their goals, children, hobbies, or holiday plans. People love to talk about themselves, and your relationship status will be quickly forgotten.
- Handling the “I Didn’t Know You Broke Up/Separated!” Conversation
If you’ve recently ended a relationship, this holiday season might be your first one without your ex. There may be relatives or friends who don’t yet know and innocently bring it up, expecting you to arrive with your ex at gatherings or mention them in conversation.
You don’t owe anyone the details of your breakup, but if you want to have something prepped, here are a few graceful ways to respond:
- “Yes, we did go our separate ways. It’s been a period of growth for me, and I’ve learned a lot about myself.”
- “It’s been an adjustment, but I’m doing okay. Let’s catch up privately sometime. I’d love to hear about what you’ve been up to too.”
- “Actually I’ve just signed up with an amazing Dating Service, and I can’t wait to be introduced to some amazing and genuine people!”
The key here is to set boundaries while keeping the tone neutral and friendly. You never know who’s listening or how far your words will travel.
- Giving Yourself Permission to Skip Events
There’s a strange pressure around the holidays, a belief that you have to attend every gathering or show up with a smile, even if you’re not feeling it. But you don’t have to do anything that’s not right for you.
If attending a particular event is likely to trigger feelings of sadness, comparison, or anxiety, give yourself permission to say ‘no thanks’.
You can always say:
- “I’m taking the opportunity to catch up with old friends this year.”
- “I’ve planned a little solo getaway for some self-care.”
- “I’m spending Christmas interstate/overseas this time around, a bit of a change of scenery.”
If you do attend a family or social gathering and find it emotionally taxing, it’s perfectly okay to leave early. Have a plan in place: maybe you’re catching up with a friend afterward or having an early night as you’re taking a road trip the next day.
You’re not being selfish, you’re protecting your emotional wellbeing.
- Dealing with Your Ex Over the Holidays
Not all breakups lead to zero contact, especially if you share children or social circles. The holiday season can bring unavoidable interactions including joint family events, handovers, or even coordinated Christmas plans for the kids.
If this is your reality, the first step is to plan logistics early. Decide on holiday schedules for the children in a fair and clear way. Once that’s settled, shift your focus to filling the gaps in your calendar where you might otherwise feel lonely.
Suggestions for solo or social holiday activities:
- Host a Friendsmas lunch or dinner.
- Sign up for an online cooking, painting, or dance class.
- Volunteer at a local charity event.
- Attend a community carols event or local market.
- Explore nearby towns or go on a spontaneous day trip.
- Watch your favourite holiday movies, with popcorn and all.
And when you do have to see your ex, aim to keep things cordial and mature. Even if they’ve moved on, that doesn’t invalidate your experience or healing process. Stay focused on your own journey.
- Reframe Being Alone as an Opportunity
It’s natural to feel lonely sometimes, but there’s a big difference between being alone and being lonely. Being single during the holidays can actually be a season of discovery, freedom, and self-love – if you want to frame it that way.
Here’s how you can make the most of it:
Reflect on the Past Year
Use the quiet moments to journal or think about your growth. What have you learned? What would you like to improve in the year ahead? What did your last relationship teach you about yourself?
Set New Year Goals
Not just resolutions, but real intentions. Maybe this is the year you travel, learn a new language, take a career leap, sign up to a course, or simply prioritise your mental health. If you’re located in Sydney or Canberra, why not consider contacting us at Vital Partners – for an experienced and caring Dating Agency Sydney and matchmaking services in Canberra.
Treat Yourself
Who says you need a partner to be pampered? Buy yourself a holiday gift, book a spa day, go to a fancy restaurant solo, or have a full self-care day at home with music, wine, and your favourite shows.
Expand Your Social Circle
Chances are, you’re not the only single person feeling a bit disconnected. Reach out to single friends or co-workers and suggest a night out or a brunch. Organise a Secret Santa among friends. Host a board game or movie night.
Being open to new experiences and new people can be exciting, and you never know where those moments can lead.
- Being Single Doesn’t Mean Being Stuck
A gentle reminder: just because you’re not in a relationship right now doesn’t mean you’re stuck or broken or behind in life.
Everyone’s journey is different. Some people meet their soulmates at 20, others at 50+. Some people marry and realise they’ve made a mistake. Others stay single and love their freedom.
Use this time to:
- Build deeper friendships.
- Improve your emotional intelligence.
- Work with a relationship coach or matchmaker (like us!).
- Practice boundaries and self-worth.
- Heal from past patterns that no longer serve you.
Being single gives you the rare gift of time. Time to become the person you want to be before you invite someone else into your life.
As a Matchmaking Agency, our matchmaking services have helped thousands of singles just like you. We help our clients to move on with confidence and trust in our process. There’s no such thing as stuck being single!
- Use the Season to Find Love (Yes, Really!)
While it might seem counterintuitive, the holiday season can actually be a great time to meet someone new.
Why?
- There are more events, parties, and gatherings happening.
- People are generally more relaxed and open during the holidays.
- Singles who attend events this time of year are often looking for meaningful connections.
- You have more conversational openings (“What are you doing for New Year’s?” or “Do you like summer holidays or winter ones better?”).
Don’t be afraid to put yourself out there:
- Attend social or networking events.
- Try a new dating agency or matchmaker with a fresh perspective.
- Ask your friends if they know anyone they could introduce you to.
- Flirt a little at the local café, bookstore, or beach.
And remember, love is not a race. Whether you meet someone this season or later on, you are still complete as you are.
This time of year when people have time off from work, or their work has a holiday close-down period, singles are ready to mingle. Vital Partners provide introduction services and we’re inundated at this time of year. So why not look at this season as the right time to meet with an introduction agency.
- Self-Love is the Real Love Story
Finally, let’s talk about you. Being single during the holidays isn’t just about avoiding awkward questions, it’s also about learning how to fully love yourself.
Nurture yourself through:
- Mindful practices: meditation, journaling, or yoga.
- Self-expression: art, writing, fashion, music.
- Health: moving your body in ways that feel good, eating nourishing foods, and sleeping well.
- Gratitude: list 3 things each day you’re thankful for, no matter how small.
- Joy: seek things that make you laugh, dance, and feel alive.
You are your longest relationship. Treat yourself with the same care, kindness, and affection you’d offer a partner, because you deserve that too.
Final Thoughts from Vital Partners
Spending the holidays single doesn’t mean spending them alone, it means giving yourself the freedom to connect in new ways, dream bigger dreams, and build a life you’re excited to share someday (with someone who truly deserves it).
At Vital Partners, we’re passionate about helping people find real love, we help singles in Sydney and Canberra.
Want more great content and relationship inspiration like this? Visit Vital Partners now!
If you are single and ready for real love, get in touch with the team at Vital Partners now or call (02) 9017 8400. Contact us today for a confidential conversation.
